Saturday, November 5, 2011

Now...wait a minute here.

I'm sitting here doing my laundry and thinking over how a half-a**ed attempt at parenting in a more communicative way/non-violent communication whatever is probably not the best thing. Having not once read a book on parenting or any of these things (how to raise a confident child, etc) I'm kind of just "winging it" which in the end probably is not helping her or myself. We are really just not getting anywhere.
And, now that I think about it don't kids just ultimately grow up and gain confidence?? I mean as long as I am not running around all day telling her how stupid she is or laughing at any attempts she makes at accomplishing long as I am not beating her at all she should be fine. As long as G and I are confident people then ultimately, she should grow up to be a confident individual as well.
I mean, come ON people. She is just two years old, going on three. Can she really make sense of what is going on in her head psychologically? Or can we for that matter? Like why does D always balk at doing the soccer exercises at her class? Why does she always cling to me?? But she says she likes soccer and she kind of likes the idea of going. Yet, when she is there and all the other kids are running around and doing what the teacher says, D does not want to do it. She would rather pull me into a corner so just she and I are doing something. WHAA?? Yeah, or while everyone else is running from side to side she wants her dad to carry her. What's a parent to do?? I mean, I am driving myself crazy over here trying to figure out how to communicate to her that this is soccer. This is supposed to be fun. Do you want to go home then?? Which of course her answer would be yes. But we have paid for these classes and I'll be darned if I just let her go home.
This is not a game. In the end, soccer is a game for her and her dad to enjoy together. Apparently, she always takes about half an hour to get warmed up (the class is only 50 minutes). Whatever, we just let her take her time. She's fine with sort of participating if I'm not around. If I'm around, she's asking for snackies.
Is there something on my face that says, "Hi! Ask me for snacks." Because truly, whenever my friends are around me, we also seem to eat a lot. So, now it's become see Mommy = snacks.
But I digress.
To my point, I feel like I am driving myself crazy trying to figure out this communication thing when at the end of the day I think we'd all be better off if I just communicate however I feel like communicating if that means ordering her to clean her room then so be it. When she turns 7, 8, 9 and is able to comprehend life and how it works, she will realize that I am not making her clean her room for my own benefit or even if it IS for my own benefit, she and everyone else who comes by benefits as well. And when she reaches her late 20's and is off on her own she'll then start to appreciate the "cleanliness" habits I've instilled in her because less clutter in her life is good. I've never been one to be hippy, dippy skippy so I really shouldn't try now. Can't teach THIS old dog new tricks. Not that there is anything wrong with hippy dippy. To each his own I say....


  1. I am cracking up over this one cuz I can just hear your brain running. The digression. Hilarious. You KNOW Paulina is going to want rice cakes the next time she sees you. :-)

    Parenting is a mystery...sometimes, u give the kid too much confidence & they're confident with no skills or know how to back it up! Then, they are just big d-bags. ;-D