Wednesday, October 19, 2011

You are not the boss of me

I think that is what D is trying to declare, but of course, I counter with, "Oooh, but I am...."
She likes to object to what I want her to do like...brush your teeth. "No."
"If you don't brush your teeth, then I won't carry you."
"Fine." And I walk away. And then D hurries to say, "I'm gonna brush my teeth! I'm gonna brush my teeth!"
Me: "Too late. Now I don't care and I'm still not carrying you."
Which results in a lot of crying...and I don't care.
Is that mean of me? Yes. I think it is and I don't think it's the right way to go about it. But I'm too immature to respond in the positive, correct way. I just don't know.

Today was interesting though. I think I've mentioned before that D does not take naps willingly. We can only get her to nap if we drive her around in a car. So, today I tried to get her to take a nap asking if she'd do so if I napped with her in her room. (I was pretty sure that was not going to work but y'never know. Sometimes kids surprise you.) Negative. It didn't work.
So, she's playing in my room. I'm telling her to get out of my room because if she doesn't want to nap, well she can't play in my room. She still needs to be in her room. Her response, No!
She says, "Carry?" Which is her way of asking me to pick her up.
Me:"No, I will not carry you. I would like you to take a nap and since you won't, I won't carry you."
D starts to cry, "But I want you to! I want you to carry me!"
Me: "No. If I carry you, will you take a nap?"
D: "No!"
Me: "Then I will not carry you."
This goes on for the next two minutes with her crying too.
Then I turn to leave the room and she cries, "Don't walk away from me!"
That was really too cute. So of course I turn around and pick her up and tell her she is ridiculous.
I guess she wins (cuz I picked her up)
But then I drove her around and she fell asleep. If I can JUST figure out how to get her to take a nap willingly!! I would save a lot of gas.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011


Today D told me a story:

Once, there was a little girl who wanted to go outside.
So, she walked down the stairs and went outside and saw a waterfall
And then she walked around it and when she did she went home and had dinner
That's the end!

Then she told another story:

Once, there was a little boy with a kitty named Go-kah.
They decided to go for a walk outside
So, they walked down to the pond. The kitty was thirsty so she took a drink of water.
Then they walked home and the boy drank some water.
Then he ate dinner and the kitty drank water.
The end.

Friday, October 14, 2011

The best of both worlds

Recently I had the opportunity to seriously consider a full time job. Oh the possibility sounded luscious! What?! GO TO WORK?? Sit at a computer all day, hanging out with adults having adult conversations about the state of the world today (or maybe just the state of fashion today). Oh that would be dreamy.
However, as I am in the back seat with D rambling on about how "this job starts part time at first with option of full time or could possibly just start full time...I had said that with full time I would want flex time - maybe in the office three days a week and out two days..." And here is D next to me chiming in, "nooo, I don't want you to."
At the time I kind of ignored that she even spoke but in my mind I had thought, "Did she just say that? Did she really understand what I was just rambling about?? Could that be?"
And then a little bit of me felt a tinge of guilt. Because it's true. If I go back to an actual office then I truly would not see her all day and maybe just see her at night for dinner and bed. I guess that is kind of sad...for her part.
So, as I sit here contemplating this new job opp I am thinking I want my cake and I want to eat it to. Maybe though I've been moaning that I've wanted to break loose and get a job maybe what I really would prefer is a NANNY! So I can work (from home) and still get the benefit of being around for D. Of course, I don't need a psychic to tell me how that situation might turn out - likely we will have a nanny sitting around here calling out to D to come over and check out this and the other, try to engage her in play and all she wants is to drape herself over my leg, the arm of my chair, get me to carry her while I am working...just a lot of nothing going on for me, the sitter and D.
This will really take some careful consideration....

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Where did she go??

Where did that perfectly "compliant" daughter of mine disappear to? Oh, yes. She's discovered her voice and is exercising her right to speak her mind.
As her mother, of course I am shocked when she refuses some foods that I give her, says no when I ask her to do something...but of course, the girl does have a mind of her own and I need to accept that.
There's a lot of "no"s going on around here when we are eating and that just kills me of course because G and I are big foodies. I am thankful, however, that I can at least plead with her to at least eat a couple bites and she will do it so that's really all I can ask for right now.
Now as for getting her to do stuff...that's a whole 'nother battle to tackle. I'm trying to put into practice giving D options as opposed to ordering her around. It's all about having her make up her own mind versus just doing my bidding.
For instance, if she doesn't want to put on her shoes. Instead of yelling at her to put on her shoes. I say, "D you can either put on your shoes or we will not be going to school. Do you want to go to school?"
Well if you don't put your shoes on, we will not be going to school.
All of this, mind you, is delivered not in a threatening tone but a matter of fact tone.
She puts on her shoes.
Come to think of it, my delivery here might not have been quite right either. I think it maybe should've been something like, "You can choose not to put your shoes on, but we can't go to school unless we have shoes on. You decide." And then go on to ask her if she wants to go to school, etc. Get it? There's a whole lot of psychology that goes into this parenting biz...
I'd always been kind of interested in psych as a career, but more so in the way of psycho-analyzing adults where I might not be so vested in the outcome.